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What’s better: calling found phone numbers, or giant swords?Vote now!
Vote now!
Before our Christmas break, I left you with a big winter decision, and I return to see that you havedynamic snow is better than seasonal events. Having hugely enjoyed recent real-world snow but not really done much in terms of seasonal events, yes, this feels correct. Well done. Now our hunt for the best thing resumes, with a choice between rill rill and cold steel. What’s better: calling found phone numbers or giant swords?
Calling found phone numbers
Trevor gets curious in GTA V
If a game gives me freedom to dial telephone numbers, and that game has telephone numbers displayed on adverts and signs and such around the world, I will dial every one of those numbers. And if it is a good game, it will have conversations and messages waiting for me.
My favourite phone numbers are inInfra, the strange and wonderful first-person explore-o-puzzler about a structural analyst inspecting buildings and facilities. It’s a game so far from conventions that it took me ages to feel confident I knew what it was, and even then it threw up surprises. So yes, of course I dialled the numbers I found near a payphone, and of course our weird guy can call companies for weird conversations about beer and kebabs. Splendid.
Phone fun in InfraWatch on YouTube
Phone fun in Infra
Giant swords
Given a choice of swords, I will gravitate towards the biggest on offer. Give me that claymore, that zweihänder, that ōdachi, that Moonlight Greatsword. It’s a simple supposition: if a sword is cool, a massive sword must be massively cool.
I like slow giant swords offering which run on risk/reward calculations. A long wind-up to raise and swing the heavy blade, a brief window where I could be interrupted but if not, I’ll clobber the foe.Dark Soulsgames often have cracking slow giant swords, these slabs of metal like headstones which can easily flatten foes if they connect. It’s especially daft when you get strong enough to one-hand and even dual-wield these swords.
I like the silliness of fast giant swords that sweep with elegance and great reach. Yes, I am thinking mostly of Dark Souls again, the absurdly long ‘washing pole’ ōdachi. FromSoftware also gave us the fantastic Hand OfMaleniainElden Ring, with its dancing moveset.
And I like the silliness of games which have ridiculous giant swords that surely weigh more than a car but are moved as fast as a foil. Sure, why not? It’s not real, go wild!
Or in games where combat is more abstract, less about specific timings and movesets, and all swords simply shuffle numbers into different attributes that ultimately lead to similar damage-per-second scores, I’ll take the giant sword there too. Sure, a smaller blade might make more numbers pop up onto my screen, but the giant sword will show me bigger numbers. And I like my numbers like I like my swords: giant.
Where should you start with Final Fantasy 7?Watch on YouTube
Where should you start with Final Fantasy 7?
But which is better?
I will almost always choose the most immersive sim-ish option, but giant swords are… agh, this is too difficult. I must sit this week out and let you decide. What do you say?
