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The RPS Temtem Pick ‘n’ Mix menu: what do your favourite Temtem taste like?Gotta snack ‘em all

Gotta snack ‘em all

Everyone is playingTemtem, but no-one is saying it: they are clearly edible. But which of these visibly delicious sweets is the best for you?

After analysis of internal business and laboratory notes, several interviews, and much research in the field, I’m pleased to present our first everTemtemflavour guide.

Paharo

Although more active in spring and autumn, these sly creatures are closely associated with Summer due to their rich strawberry flavour. Opinion is divided on whether to separate the distinctive ‘leaf’ portion before eating, but aside from its texture and colour there is little difference. Connoisseurs invariably recommend allowing the Paharo to ripen until it becomes visibly haughty, but few can resist these sweet and delectable morsels for long enough to see it happen.

Magmis

Taifu

The Taifu is of course the mature form of the Hidody. Bitter and unpleasantly grassy, these creatures are in fact juvenile forms of a third, unusually delicious temtem with a strong banana flavour and soft texture. However, the experiment that birthed this flavour was an embarassing failure, as no Taifu has ever grown past this intermediary, semi-edible stage.

Fomu

Minty and refreshing, the Fomu should not be stored alongside fruitier temtemses, as the Fomu will soften, losing its distinctive crispy shell, and the flavour of most other bagmates will be spoiled. If properly kept, the Fomu will mature into a Wiplump, trading the intensity of the mint for a delightful creamy base that pairs better with the fruitier varieties.

Pigepic

An unexpected flavour in many ways, the Pigepic’s harmless fluffy appearance masks its particularly aggressive behaviour, and its unlikely bacon flavour is the definition of an acquired taste. The candyfloss ‘coat’, chewy texture, and initial hint of salt have put off many a conservative taster expecting a traditional sweet, but perseverence is rewarded with a complex and balanced treat that perfectly rounds off a selection, and can even counteract the excessive sweetness of temtems like the Spriole. Note: All Pigepics are lethally poisonous to cats.

Occlura

Ganki

Kaku

Zizare

Zizare will kill again.