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Henry Cavill’s good, but he’s got nothing on these five celebrity PC buildsStatham, Lansbury, Elba, Rudd and Lizzo reveal their secrets
Statham, Lansbury, Elba, Rudd and Lizzo reveal their secrets
Lovable television strongman Henry Cavill overclocked hearts around the world when hedocumented his latest PC buildon Instagram this week, reminding us all once again that even Hollywood A-listers with inhuman physiques can turn out to be giant, lovable nerds on the inside.
Watch on YouTube
Watch on YouTube
But as it transpires, Cavill isn’t the only one in Tinseltown who knows their way around these inscrutable, whirring machines we call “computers”. Indeed, in the wake of his charming video, a swathe of weapons-grade celebs have come out of the woodwork to reveal their secret hardware passion, and have all - somehow - chosen to share their PC build secrets exclusively with us. Read on, then, as we reveal the rigs of the stars:
Jason Statham
Angela Lansbury
In the rare event she loses a round of Warzone, she’ll hurl her current computer into space to punish it, before lighting a few scented candles in her study, and rattling off a quick canticle of ligature in ancient Akkadian. As we all know, this will summon an unholy familiar bound to her service, which Lansbury will send into the world to acquire a selection of reasonably-priced components for her. Once the components are collected, she will extinguish every light in her mansion and assemble the computer with the power of her mind, while singing a medley of pleasant show tunes. Be warned, then: if you’re ever in PC World, and see a dog with radiant yellow eyes and human hands come in with a shopping list, you’ll know Lansbury is on the hunt.
Idris Elba
Idris Elba laughed when I showed him Henry Cavill’s PC build video. He was at my house, you see, where we were enjoying a nice lunch of crisps as we often do, before settling down to play a spot of Age Of Empires 2. “Yeah, that’s cute,” Idris said of Netflix’s Geralt as he fiddled about with wires, “but watch this”.Watch what?I thought to myself, as Idris drained the last of a bag of wotsits into his mouth, but theHobbs & Shawstar just broke into a lopsided grin and said he’d tell me after he’d taken a quick break to go to the loo. When he came back from his ablutions, however, Idris revealed nothing: he just winked, and said “you’ll know soon enough”, before joining me in a 2v2 Team Islands game, where we utterly thrashed the opposition.
When the game was done Idris bid me farewell and, with a single flap of his enormous arms, he soared out of my kitchen window into the sky. As his traditional parting cry ofIdris, Away!echoed through my home, I felt somewhat dejected that he had left before telling me his secret… until I visited the bathroom myself and discovered his prank. There, lying in the bowl of my toilet, was an entire mid-range gaming PC - completely spotless and ready to play. I shook my head and smiled.Idris bloody Elba, I thought,you’ve only gone and shat out a perfectly assembled computer, haven’t you?. That smooth bastard; he’d done it again.
Paul Rudd
Lizzo
When she wants to take on her ultimate form, Lizzo screws up her eyes really hard and sings the forbidden note known as Middle J, whereupon she will morph into a tower unit with a spectacular RGB light setup in a matter of seconds. Unfortunately, she doesn’t come with a monitor (although Harry Styles is rumoured to turn into anAcer Predatoron moonless nights), and the only game in her Steam library isDaikatana, but it’s an impressive feat nonetheless. Thanks for being able to turn into a computer, Lizzo <3
