HomeFeaturesThe Eternal Cylinder
Apparently I might be weird for thinking everything in The Eternal Cylinder looks like a willy?I’m not though, I can prove it
I’m not though, I can prove it
The Eternal Cylinder - Strange New World TrailerWatch on YouTube
The Eternal Cylinder - Strange New World Trailer
Watching the progress of the Cylinder is oddly hypnotic. It crushes everything that doesn’t get out of the way.
Look, I’m fully sure I’m not being weird about this. Just watch the trailer up there. It’s like going through an orgy in a car wash: a rainbow variety of sticky-outy bits and going-inny bits flying at you at eye level. While a big cylinder is menacingly whirring along behind you, mark you. The animals also have names like ‘sack fly’, I don’t know what you expect from me here.
You have to remember a lot of different, interlocking pieces of info, but there’s a pretty detailed codex that updates as you discover new things. Mostly this is a process of eating stuff and seeing what happens (and in the game). You eventually unlock a map, which is a lot of help.
The Eternal Cylinder: come for the giggling like a 13-year-old, stay for the smart design on a unique survival adventure. When I told some of my friends all this, they indicated that I was a Freudian nightmare of a person. One said he was “mildly concerned” about the genitals I have seen in my life. But on the other hand, I canvased the RPS Treehouse and at least two people agree with me.
For science, here are pictures of some but not all of the things I think look like willies, fannies or bums in The Eternal Cylinder:
Trebhum
Obviously. Pictured above is my square Trebhum, talking to an Elder Trebhum. Look at the Elder. It’s even wrinkly. Do I seriously have to say anthing here? Clearly even the Trebhum know what they look like. It’s why their expressions are so melancholy.
Disquieting fleshlight worm
These things sort of wobble around the place like slinkies, pausing occasionally to spit out balls of matter. Eating said matter will turn your Trebhum into a horrible-looking water factory.
Dicktrumpet vines
Terrifying penis-giraffe
I have only seen these from a distance. It looks like it might be some species of awful filter feeder, because every so often it does this -
- and peels up a reverse jaw that runs the entire length of its neck-body. I hate it.
Licking pug fish
At least, Ithinkthey’re fish. They move on the land in sacks of water and they have to lick the side in the direction they want to go. You often see them bouncing ahead of you when you’re fleeing the cylinder.
TEETH
They chase you and will eat you.
Gaseous sex-dirigible
I don’t know what these things are, but I know they look like deviants and they areeverywhere.
So, reader. Does everything in The Eternal Cylinder look like a willy, Y/N?
